Yep, my manager informed me that I would probably be marked down this six-month review period since the project I have been team lead for just hasn't been meeting expectations. I think I could have done more, and asked more questions, or brought more things to light as the project progressed.
I have been using c# for nearly a year and a half and I think for the first year or so I was hoping that I could program in any other language. I think attitude has a lot to do with this.
I have had a strong desire to leave my current position and find a job in system administration, or some type of scripting that I know so much better. It sort of made me think about my performance and wonder how I might be more happy and what would help me excel more. After coming back from my two-week vacation I had a renewed spirit and desire to accomplish all the things placed in my way and to work until I am the best at what I do.
I also have been thinking about my brand. I guess I think of myself as someone who can solve any problem presented. I have thought about what motivates me. I've noticed that I really like designing software. I like coding my design, but I don't like the coding as much as accomplishing what I have seen in my mind before starting. I was offered a job that didn't seem to me that it would quite do that for me. I guess I need to figure this out in my mind and how I can take that creative energy and apply it to any project that I haven't come up with. I have really started to wonder about how I might take a project I don't have a large amount of interest and take it over and make a design for it. I think I need to redefine myself as the designer of the code. The person who makes things and makes them well. Shortcomings I have are not being able to estimate as well as I should. I think I need to make certain to really understand a product. Things that bug me about my current job is how sometimes I just get told what to develop and I feel like the design is taken away. Maybe that's a good thing.